Table 2 Interaction of structural features and psychological processes mechanisms of impact in SMS4dads

1. synced info

So having that information ready is really a good strategy.

Can interact in ways that are appropriate

So the timing worked really well... it helps when you get a bit stressed

Because the article and stuff and the link went through how that was beneficial, you feel like you’re contributing.

Again, it was just a text message but you’re checking in on me and you’re saying things that actually are happening to me as I’m getting the text messages.

2. normalising

Once or twice one would come in just as she was having a bit of a worse off time and it was just helpful to remember that it’s fairly natural thing for them to go through.

Just having the little reminders that it’s not actually anything we were doing specifically, but it’s just how this whole process works. It definitely helps restore your confidence when you’ve had a hit.

So it sort of like calmed me a little bit, from the perspective of not freaking out or whatever or not – you know, not being too concerned about something that really wasn’t a concern, it was just normal.

Just of planting those ideas that OK, that could be why the child’s crying, it’s not to do with me being a bad parent or anything like that.

I suppose it sort of reinforces in me that she is doing a good job and what she’s doing is perfectly normal and she is going to experience these rough times as well.

3. prompts to interact

Some of those message that were a bit instructive about different interactions or things to try. I definitely tried things after seeing messages.

I think they definitely gave me some other ideas…made me feel more confident.

It’s a prompt for me to raise something that maybe I would have left until things had gotten sort of to the point where it would have been harder.

That’s what triggered something in me to say, “you know what, I really need to be a little bit more active in that area”.

Every time I got it she was like, “What was the message today?” and then we’d have a joke about the video camera being in the corner of the room.

4.safety net

…click on to the links and go through the articles. But I often find it’s better that way because …[people say] “if you’re not doing it the way I did you’re doing it wrong.”

And you get these coming through and you go, well even if it’s not a friend, at least it’s something that’s reminding me that I’m doing a good job.

It felt like somebody just walked into my office, put their hand on my shoulder and said, “Are you okay?” And that’s golden.

“Look after myself first and then I’m able to help someone else”.

A “sort of mate tapping you on the shoulder”,